The Root of All Evil
I suck at money management. Always have. Can't wrap my brain around "estimating" expenses....if I don't keep penny by penny tabs, I always find that I've spent way more than I though I had. I never have a slush fund....I live paycheck to paycheck. I can't seem to figure out the whole budget thing.
This is a source of contention with my husband. He asks where all of my money goes. I always say I don't know, and that is the truth! I don't buy clothes or jewelry or make up. I stopped buying books and scrapbook supplies years ago. I fire the housekeeper. My extravagances these days seem to be taking the boys out to eat. And we don't even do that much any more. I do spend $35 a month on BlockBuster to Go. Should I cancel that? Probably.
I really want to get better at this. It's not fair that DH pays all of the bills (except for daycare). I contribute virtually nothing to this family. I don't like that DH has so little respect for me; salt in the wound that I have brought it on myself.
He wants to change careers. He's been unhappy in his job for a long time, and I of all people know what it is to hate your job. I want to support him in his decision to change jobs. But, as he pointed out today, a career change means a reduction in income, and doesn't think he can count on me to help. I offered to let him take over my money management altogether. Give me an allowance. Give him access to my account and let him handle the bills. He has not accepted this offer.
So, this is what I will do. I will send him a weekly financial report of all my expenses. Here is what I got paid. This is what I spent and on what. Here is my credit card payment and outstanding balance. What would he like to see me do differently?
This is me handing over a piece of my independence. Financial dependency used to outrage me. Now I don't care. It's a burden to me, since I do it so poorly.
This is a source of contention with my husband. He asks where all of my money goes. I always say I don't know, and that is the truth! I don't buy clothes or jewelry or make up. I stopped buying books and scrapbook supplies years ago. I fire the housekeeper. My extravagances these days seem to be taking the boys out to eat. And we don't even do that much any more. I do spend $35 a month on BlockBuster to Go. Should I cancel that? Probably.
I really want to get better at this. It's not fair that DH pays all of the bills (except for daycare). I contribute virtually nothing to this family. I don't like that DH has so little respect for me; salt in the wound that I have brought it on myself.
He wants to change careers. He's been unhappy in his job for a long time, and I of all people know what it is to hate your job. I want to support him in his decision to change jobs. But, as he pointed out today, a career change means a reduction in income, and doesn't think he can count on me to help. I offered to let him take over my money management altogether. Give me an allowance. Give him access to my account and let him handle the bills. He has not accepted this offer.
So, this is what I will do. I will send him a weekly financial report of all my expenses. Here is what I got paid. This is what I spent and on what. Here is my credit card payment and outstanding balance. What would he like to see me do differently?
This is me handing over a piece of my independence. Financial dependency used to outrage me. Now I don't care. It's a burden to me, since I do it so poorly.
posted by Rhonda L at 8:50 PM
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